my husband left me because he was unhappy

I hope that your marriage works out and you and your husband will be happy once again together. He sent me a long message to me apologising . My husband left me on 10-14-15, after 2years of being married says he found the person he had been looking for since he been in Florida, what I dont understand is why marry someone if you were looking for someone else??? It hurts because i love him. If a man is wondering, looking, you can almost bet he is cheating. I feel now I am stuck either serving my x to her wishes just to see my children but never afford it. Guilt that your children have a mentally ill parent that you can . I want to move back to Florida and i just dont think its worth us fighting to save the marriage anymore. It took some comments by others, even his own family to see how much I compensated and accommodated. I think he is waiting to see about this house he is looking at. And who are the casualties in all this? Two months and I dont feel better. I wish you all the best finding the new you and someone who loves you for who you really are!! Anyway things bumbled along for about 2 years then her new best friend decided to came on to me which I thought was a joke at first as that sort of thing never happens to me (my wife is the pretty one). Rachel Im sure everyone on this site will concur that most partners who leave think about it for years before doing it. So its interesting that he would say that wasnt good enough for me, that I wasnt there for him all he wanted was for someone to love him and listen to him. Thanks cassieD.I feel no more,Like i am dead.I have tried therapy.nothing is helping.i feel like there is no hope for me. It made me feel sick. I guess Im in the shock phase right now. You know in your heart this is totally unacceptable behavior. The aftermath, says Emma, was brutal. I am devastated we have 3 children and one doing his GCSEs I am a mess my daughter keeps questioning me and Im trying to hold it together but Im in so much pain and I cant imagine my life without him I see him on occasion for months have passed since we actually exchanged any communication, recently exchange some emails regarding my children who are now a senior in high school and a sophomore in college. Thank you for sharing. Lately he has been sleeping in the spare room, leaves in the morning to visit his parents, comes back and then blames me saying that he dosent want to be around someone miserable. I started this relationship and had a son at age 19 years.. Please contact us if you have any questions. Stay Focused, Pray, Keep Faith and Believe . Rather than an excess of painful emotion, it was the lack of pain, the lack of feeling, that was the . Your not the only one Focus on yourself and kids. I guess theres a lot of money being made in the divorce and recovery business encouraging people like my ex wife to wreck our families. This is making me absolutely sick. She misses her girls and she feels her siblings and their partners treat her and look at her differently. If he was the man for me he wouldnt of left me. These tips may help you let go of the past, including someone who hurt you. Hey there all. He is totally messed up in the head and most of the stuff he says contradicts itself one day to the next. The GoodTherapy.org Team. Its gotten really wild and way more frequent! Your partner felt ignored and unappreciated. Knowing what to do when your husband abandons you, your wife picks up and leaves, or your partner suddenly calls it quits can be challenging. We had a solid marriage and two great kids. We have had plenty of problems since we had kids together but we were both Farley young when this happened so that could be the problem. and more lately photos on the Internet with him on holiday with a past flirt that came to light on a social net work . My husbands sister just got served with divorce papers today I still would. For THIRTY years, I pined horribly over this bull****. I fell deeply and it was the hardest six months of my life. I just didnt know about it. He has gone to his friends to see if we can make it work. Thanks The same thing happened to me after an argument a few days prior, my husband said it was over. I stopped for a quart of ice cream on my way home from work today, ugh. Im starting to think he has someone else but he says not I cant believe he would do this to me so am I just being paranoid because I cant accept that he just doesnt love me anymore or is it a possibility because it seems like he has somewhere else to go I do love my husband. Although I was half expecting it in the weeks leading up to the night we separated, the impact was greater than anything I have experienced. What Im trying to say is that it becomes about saving face. Well she met me and and my legs were shaking really bad while I was talking to my wife about what I found and showed her. I have no control over their daily lives with her I can only be thankful her parents are so actively involved in her life which she has thus far been able to suck the life out of them to the point I dont think they will last much longer. All rights reserved. They dont say how to handle the part before Im ok cause Im not ok. And, I do have a shrink for a totally different personal issue, but she just had a baby. Strung me along for 6 months while dating other woman. Kids dont know, says he is making sure. :), I am retired navy vet and I read. I want move out of state or go back to my country but, i also have a little hope that in a few months she will change her mind Its worth absolutely zero to her. You will recover and you will be loved xxx, Hi, Only we have a son together. Without her, I would not be here to tell this story., Often our first is when we are young, in high school even. Any suggestions please. The right man will respect what you have been through, he will be patient and kind and above most understanding. So sorry for what you are going through. And I have plenty of divorced friends who are now happy. A few weeks have now passed and Xmas has come and gone and no kids for me, nothing. I loved him dearly and I still do, I had resentment built up because he didnt always treat me the best. He just kept saying it was his problem. He decided this life, our life, wasnt for him.. three months ago my husband called me to say he wanted my daughter and I to move out so he can move his girlfriend in. Dont you think you deserve better than that???? One way you may seek fresh validation and appreciation might be through a new romantic partner. Coping with the end of a relationship can be difficult on many levels. I will relate it to what I experienced; maybe it will help someone else. Try and stay strong, I know how it feels. He is not the man I have been with for the last 15 years This was a deliberate act carried out by those who are unethical and immoral. Tha t is my hope and prayer. We can use our parents for communication or others but absolutely zero contact from now on is the only way to make the hurt stop. With a few self-care tips and a whole lot of. It ended as I couldnt cope with casual and then I had to tell husband because I was so ill. Three months on, I am still totally in love with him. I have being with him 5 years and we broke up once cause he didnt want kids. No matter how much you hated your husband for leaving you, the fact is, he still loves you. Over the past year he has been leaving me in the dark about a lot of stuff. He would pick on me for everything in front of the kids. During this time my Family saw the truth, because my ex husband and his girlfriend did so many cruel things. He says he loves me very much but is not in love with me I am devastated feel like Im dying inside. I resented my husband a lot during this time. Paul W. Paul what did you do to overcome the sadness? Then there is the one thats left out. He acts like nothing is wrong, asks me to go hang with them etc. I wonder if he's OK. New Inside Mental Health Podcast Episode, Working moms cant have it all, but fitness expert and TV host Brooke Burke shares how they can have more on this episode of the Inside Mental Health. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. That will never happen. You think I wanna sit and have thanksgiving dinner with you? Slightly distant. Now mid 20s. After 24 years of marriage, and 27 years of being together, my wife told me she no longer was in love with me. He called my 93 year old mother and told her he threw me out!! Her loneliness for her family is strong. But nope we ship off to my place and to my horror she wont answer the phones all weekend which really catches me off guard, I thought we were doing something here. You have to understand that this is a painful process, and its going to take time. A few days ago out of the blue he said he wants to split up. For the best part of a week I thought he wanted space. His health issues are not serious. The truth is if it is important to you, it should be important to him. Only that is no longer who she is. And they turned their back on me and their grand kids. Ive let go, Ive got my life back and cant wait to hear you and others on this site can feel the same way . . Hes 52 years old.its been 2 months of separation. She tried to abduct our son from daycare and it only didnt happen because my daycare worker knew of my wifes history and that Im more of the primary caregiver because of her instability. I believe it is due to her sickness as we were two peas in a pod for the last 19 years. The long and short of my story is that I came home from work last night to find my girlfriend of almost 2 years and 8 months living together with her bags packed and a car outside with her mums friend waiting. I served honorably for 27 years in the Army, receiving the highest peacetime award for my service. Plus I have all these young children to look after :( my heart breaks. It has now been some time since then and many conversations regarding the relationship not being one where we operated as a couple. Write to Family Life, The Guardian . cheat ,refuse to except your responabillity dont come crying when the shit hits the fan and nobody wants nothing to do with you .I love my kids still love my wife and will do anything to make their live good I wish her all the best with the new man but fear , a relationship built on lies and deceit is a disaster waiting to happen .Good luck to all who have been cheated on I wish you all the happiness you can find be strong and trust in yourself , trust me nobody but you can make this better so walk with head held high feel proud that you didnt sink to their level best of luck one mightily piss off deserted husband. And they spoke to their daughter over phone. Ive never had any depression or anxiety OCD or any mental illness . Still I feel compelled to tell you that I understand. Like being inside of Hitlers mind. Hes said if theres anything I need and he can help with he will because he wont see me go without because he cares, i dont know if hes saying this because he does actually want things to work out and just needs space or if hes just being kind about the break up because he knows by me living back with my parents that will upset me at times aswell because my dad has terminal cancer I just want to know if I have a chance of getting this relationship back or weather hes just doing the kindest breakup he can x, I have been married for 16 years at first he said we had fallen apart and that i did appreciate him. I feel very sad this happened to you but if she is leaving so quick without giving you a fair chance she may just be a self-centered person. She misses hosting family gatherings, although she still attends them at her husbands house. She is such a loving person always called him to say hi. I have not moved for 2 days I cant stop thinking is she better then me? I work full time and take care of everything in the house. Loyalty, infidelity, honesty. He left his phone in the locker and i walked around for another hour looking for them. So I told her last week this crap isnt right and if she wants to be single every weekend than I cant be there at all and we will be zero contact at all. I know that getting over your husband is a very difficult process to go through. The first reason is practical and plausible; the latter can be a devastating blow to the heart and ego. With no signs no reason why just said he had to go he had to do it. Six months where I have stayed silent on this topic because of the guilt and . I have recently been told by my wife that she is divorcing me. My prayers are for you but know that the pain will subside with time. I took it over as there were 4super large steel trays full of food that would have gone to waste if I left it at home. my wife of 25 years had a facebook affair with a strange man from the UK she had this affair online for eight months.and they met only 10 month after his wife died. The next day he told me that he did not want it to continue in a relationship with me. Its safe to say its probably in the bloodline, and Ive got great role models there. He seems to be always angry at somebody or some thing. children. She refuses to answer her phones and when I do get her mom to go there, she refuses to see our child even when I dropped off at her moms which is super close. now this 55 year old woman, has pierced her nose, lip, all up and down both ears, and has gotten three tattoos.it is very strange behavior, for a woman who went to church. And thats not good because he wont want to be with anyone who cant keep her self-respect. When I first found out he said he would never leave me but now she has said she cant live undercover. Damn well I was paying half of the bills if not more. And when I was called up to get her. The obvious answer is he is sleeping with the friend. Rage that would be primarily directed towards friends and family. Hey there. Getting in touch with a professional relationship coach is one of the best things you can do in order to start taking care of yourself and living a fulfilling and happy life. I certainly wouldnt feel the need to reply with a comment if someone suggested to see a Rabbi BECAUSE IT DOESNT APPLY TO ME. Im not perfect and have owned and taken responsibility for all my faults but the blame. Unfortunately, theres little we can do about that. 4. . It hit me like a ton of bricks. It will all Fall into Place . Sage, yah that sounds like an affair and it sounds like she is admitting to it in her own way. I dont know what to do, pls I desperately need help. Below, divorce attorneys and marriage therapists share the most damaging things you can say in a marriage and what you should say to your spouse instead. She has quite a few friends and is self reliant. Although my son is older, he still has two years of high school left. I have paid for the clothes on his back to the cigs in his mouth since day 1. And if its not normalized that this happens to lots of people, then they will wind up meeting and marrying someone else, and experience this same issue down the road. This all may be true, but once the life goes out of the partnership, it takes a lot of work to cultivate it back to where it needs to be. Im not a dumb guy, I swear it. It takes a brave man to walk out on his wife and kids. Not a good thing for Xmas but you can only pick up the pieces and do your best to move on. She had forgiven me on every occasion but this recent one, really hit her. I was lost. Your marriage can't be strong and peaceful if your husband is acting like he doesn't care. When I confronted him he lied and said he had just came home late assuming that I was sleeping. There are always ways and things to try other than giving up. To the outside world, Emme lived a charmed life. I wish you all the best If you need help finding a therapist, you are welcome to call us. What a cold hearted person after four years the best advise I can give you is feel the pain go threw it and never take him back but please for the sake of your sanity forgive him for leaving you later you see where the mistakes were made and you will thank him for doing you a huge favor. I need some advice and to help here with my own feelings. Im heartbroken and sad for out two boys who love him so much. Seems life will continue and I appreciate the hope you have instilled through sharing the stories you have all provided. This is his second time. I questioned her about it and she denied it. Once you enter your information, youll be directed to a list of therapists and counselors who meet your criteria. In the same boat. Just type online discussion forums into any search engine and youll find plenty of forums that can help you get through this. 6. By the time I left, I hardly knew who I was anymore. For his mothers birthday I baked and cooked all night and day. Having children does not entitle you to a handicap parking spot., The life I imagined crashed before me and fell to pieces. Now he stops communicating with anyone that tries to talk him in to reconciliation. She recommends practicing self-compassion, and treating yourself the same way you would treat a friend going through the experience. Medical lot are checking daily but there is nothing I can do. She came home and during our talk she slipped and said she had slept in the same bed as him. I thought everything was going well, we were hitting on better than ever, having more fun talking more, I felt confident things were going well as he told me they were. Knowing myself and how hard I have worked to be where I am in life, being raised in a lovely family, and overcoming another abusive relationships before I knew it was time for me to leave that relationship soon after our 6th anniversary. Good luck to you all..Ive learnt in the last month..love yourself, think positive and ask for help when you need. Hopefully my therapy along with meds will help me survive this horrible time of my life. I am in a deep and dark place.I am totally stressed out.I love her so much. She moved in with me for several months, but had second thoughts and ended moving to one of her relatives for a few months to sort things out. She was a part of his life in the past but my kids and I are his present and future. He obviously had no intentions of returning. Seriously, scared me. His excuse is he doesnt want the government involved. If those people were true friends they would tell them that what they are doing or have done is wrong . Take care. In a way i feel the same way. And he got away with it, because if the corrupt Judicial system. I guess I still love her as pathetic as that sounds. MGTOW all the way Baby. LOL. If you are not than this is a problem that needs solved, as I am sure you would be right at his side if roles were reversved. She was slurring her speech and dragging her shoulder on the wallls in front of our kids from the beginning of all of this. Gender disparity in the rate of partner abandonment in patients with serious medical illness. I didnt take money from the family to buy stuff for myself, I didnt spend a bunch of our money on pain pills and lose my job while my wife was five months pregnant, I didnt cheat, I didnt constantly lie about everything. So we moved and then I noticed she one week she ceas carry we cell with her at all times, this was not like her she even slept with it . My husband of 5 yrs n partner of 8 yrs cheated. So, if you want to give your marriage another chance,watch his simple and genuine video here. I cant trust anything that comes out of his mouth, such a loser!!!! And if you cant forgive him, it might be time for you to walk away from this relationship completely because this isnt a good place for anyone to be in. Hi Kelly, I know what it feels like to go through that.

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